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Author Topic: Bachelor Tips  (Read 18330 times)

Offline TranzNDance

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Bachelor Tips
« Reply #15 on: May 19, 2004, 03:35:26 PM »
Quote from: leighsww
Hey, Thu2, you can't post your tips, cuz you're not a bachelor ... or are you of the opposite GENDER, as well?

GAD, a lot of "bi's" here!  :shock:

How much more girly can one get than to kill bugs with something that smells nice? :D
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Offline skeetley

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Bachelor Tips
« Reply #16 on: May 19, 2004, 03:36:48 PM »
Quote from: TranzNDance
Quote from: leighsww
Hey, Thu2, you can't post your tips, cuz you're not a bachelor ... or are you of the opposite GENDER, as well?

GAD, a lot of "bi's" here!  :shock:

How much more girly can one get than to kill bugs with something that smells nice? :D


Who says it has to smell nice?  I was thinking spray cheese, silly string, etc.
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Offline TranzNDance

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« Reply #17 on: May 19, 2004, 03:39:15 PM »
Quote from: Shadowrunner
Whoooooooah whooooooah ladies.

You can't be in here. It's the bachelor pad.

I guess that's why you guys are single... don't know how to play with girls. :poke:
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Offline skeetley

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« Reply #18 on: May 19, 2004, 03:39:51 PM »
Laundry, the Bachelor Way.

Laundry. That annual task that all men dread. And with good reason. Cleaning clothes just plain sucks.

It is a little-known fact that any item of clothing, no matter how filthy, will be clean again if you just leave it alone for two weeks.
Some stains can’t be simply scratched off. Sometimes you have to lick them too.
Smelling it is the only reliable test of cleanliness.
If the washer is broken, throw items in the bathtub with some detergent and swirl them around with a broomstick. Throw the sopping mess on the porch to air dry.
Got a difficult to remove stain? Easy! Find a matching Magic Marker and color in that stain.
Don’t forget the Lemon Pledge for the “smell of clean” afterward.
After too many permanent stains, a shirt becomes a “work shirt” which means you never need wash it.
No item of clothing is technically “dirty” until after you actually take it off. In other words, if it was clean when you put it on, it stays clean until you take it off.
All colors can go in the wash together. That “temperature thing” is a myth to make you buy more over-priced detergent.
A simple way to cover up bad smelling clothes is to simply rub garlic and onions all over them. Everyone will assume you had Italian food for lunch. No one will be the wiser.

Acceptable substitutes when you find yourself out of detergent: Murphy’s Oil Soap, Dish Washing Liquid, Dishwasher Tablets, Lemon Pledge, Aqua Velva, Windex, Garlic & Onions
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Offline Stewart

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« Reply #19 on: May 19, 2004, 03:40:46 PM »
<===<<Drools

Spray cheese is good.

Speaking of things under the sink that actually have a use.

Brasso.

Simply take 2 slices of bread (you can use the green stuff for this) and position them on top of a container. Now pour the brasso through the bread slowly. The bread acts as a filter removing all that nasty colouring leaving a clear liquid.

Repeat this process as many times as neccesary to fill multiple containers and place in the cold spot till your party is ready.

**Warning Although the alcohol content is 99.9% proof it will cause blindness for upto 48 hours at a time. This is a good time to ensure the carpet has been well cleaned by teh cats to ensure you don't step in something ucky**
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leighsww

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Bachelor Tips
« Reply #20 on: May 19, 2004, 03:41:45 PM »
Quote from: Shadowrunner
Whoooooooah whooooooah ladies.

You can't be in here. It's the bachelor pad.


Oh, do you bachelors have a special brand or is it the Depends?

Quote from: Shadowrunner
What if we'd wanted to spend the evening sitting in just our underwear eating pizza and watching the cat shadows?


Well, at least you wear underwear!!   :thumb:

Offline skeetley

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« Reply #21 on: May 19, 2004, 03:43:40 PM »
Quote from: leighsww
Well, at least you wear underwear!!   :thumb:


only on special occasions.
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Offline TranzNDance

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« Reply #22 on: May 19, 2004, 03:43:59 PM »
Quote from: skeetley
Some stains can’t be simply scratched off. Sometimes you have to lick them too.

omg! I almost choked on my spaghetti when I read this. Now I know better than to eat and read! :?
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Offline Stewart

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« Reply #23 on: May 19, 2004, 03:44:41 PM »
Does the Spaghetti have Garlic and Onions through it?
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leighsww

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Bachelor Tips
« Reply #24 on: May 19, 2004, 03:45:04 PM »
Okay, you know what?!  This is REALLY scaring me now, cuz the descriptions are just too explicit and detailed to be anything but the truth! :(

Someone call in the health department!  :cry:

Offline skeetley

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« Reply #25 on: May 19, 2004, 03:47:50 PM »
Sheesh, us single guys get mocked in one thread, so we come hang out here and you gals follow us.   Hmmm.... are we that good of company?
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Offline skeetley

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« Reply #26 on: May 19, 2004, 03:49:22 PM »
What bachelor life means to me

Popcorn. It’s what’s for dinner.
Car parts on the kitchen table. As God intended it.
Put the lid down? As if.
Godzilla-themed 'december25th' trees.
Shaving? Sure, whatever.
Never having to close the bathroom door.
The remote control. ’Nuff said.
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Offline TranzNDance

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« Reply #27 on: May 19, 2004, 03:50:59 PM »
Quote from: skeetley
Sheesh, us single guys get mocked in one thread, so we come hang out here and you gals follow us.   Hmmm.... are we that good of company?

It was because you guys are so simply irresistible.

Alas, we got the hint.  :cry: leighsww , let's start our own thread.
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leighsww

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« Reply #28 on: May 19, 2004, 03:53:36 PM »
BUT, Thu2, it'll be boring without the guys to clobber and maim!   :(  :cry:

Offline Stewart

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« Reply #29 on: May 19, 2004, 03:53:40 PM »
Bachelor life and what it means to me.

Pizza. It's what's for dinner.
Computer parts all over the place. As God intended it.
Put the lid down? These things have lids?
Star Wars themed 'december25th' Trees.
Shaving? Um I suppose so.
Never having to fit bathroom doors.
Telephone free to call my friends.
for friends dearly missed
:whip:

 

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