I am a web desiger and purchased a VPS account a few months ago so that the server could be set up optimally for running Joomla sites. But I have not yet found the solution to configuring the server properly for Joomla hosting. The problems I have encountered have been variously addressed in this Forum and on other sites, but I do not have the skill in using Linux + Apache + PHP to configure the server. I have called numerous times, read numerous posts, and bought a few books but still have not found a way or someone who could solve my problem.   

The problem, as far as I can understand it, seems to be that Apache owns certain files/directories and FTP (me) owns other files/directories. Joomla is therefore confused about accessing certain files/directories. When I upload the Joomla script via FTP to the VPS server it shows that the files are not writable by Joomla during installation. Changing CHMOD to 777 creates security problems. Other problems which result from this situation have to do with installing components in Joomla or templates.
 
I would like to find a solution to configure the VPS server properly so that I can upload Joomla and not worry about the complexities of permissions  and ownership. I assume this is possible. Is there some method, PHP setup or script to make files/directories owned by both Apache and me. I read a little about suPHP but do not have any background with this. The whole issue bears strongly on security. I would like the best security as well as full access.

I have run Joomla on shared hosting accounts with Lunar Pages with no problems. What is different about how the VPS is set up and the shared accounts? Is there any way that the way in which the shared sites were configured could be done with my VPS account.

References:
http://www.joomla.org/
http://forum.joomla.org/viewtopic.php?t=121470
http://www.lunarforums.com/lunarpages_vps_hosting/problems_with_file_permissions-t44260.0.html
http://www.lunarforums.com/lunarpages_dedicated_web_hosting/server_upgrade_caused_access_errors_with_php_scripts-t40639.0.html

Thanks for the reply. This is one of the solutions that I read about before but do not have the expertise to set it up myself. For my own reference I am copying part of your link above: